It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
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