Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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