Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Randomize
