I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Randomize