Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
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