dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
