she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize