I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
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