I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
