I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
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