Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
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