So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
