I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize