hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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