Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
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