I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.