Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(303): View more from Colorado

pwbgyin

(1-303): View more from Colorado

what?

(303): View more from Colorado

penguin condom

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(303): pwbgyin (1-303): what? (303): penguin condom http://tfl.nu/0ju9

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(740): View more from Ohio

Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.

(740): View more from Ohio

Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight

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(740): Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook. (740): Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight http://tfl.nu/qdoi

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(302): View more from Delaware

So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?

(443): View more from Maryland

I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"

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(302): So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned? (443): I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me" http://tfl.nu/og83

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"

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(717): I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal" http://tfl.nu/9g1t

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(604): View more from British Columbia

The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am

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(604): The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am http://tfl.nu/p2ec

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.

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(508): Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well. http://tfl.nu/uja4

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(916): View more from California

It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.

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(916): It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable. http://tfl.nu/6byi

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.

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(617): i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line. http://tfl.nu/bi31

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(61): View more from Australia

I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY

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(61): I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY http://tfl.nu/btxo

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(406): View more from Montana

Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.

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(406): Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule. http://tfl.nu/1636

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness

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(412): I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness http://tfl.nu/j7n1

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(817): View more from Texas

Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.

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(817): Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence. http://tfl.nu/yx0o

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that

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(262): Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that http://tfl.nu/fjxw

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(404): View more from Georgia

The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.

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(404): The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples. http://tfl.nu/02p9

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(828): View more from North Carolina

does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?

(828): View more from North Carolina

if not i want to bang those glasses off his face

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(828): does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you? (828): if not i want to bang those glasses off his face http://tfl.nu/l0mr

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