make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?