idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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