I wanna eat
then eat your cupcake
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
last night I used snow as a chaser