so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
You know, be my cock's hype man.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Randomize
