Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
What did we do last night that was yellow?
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I look better un-naked...
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize