im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize