the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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