You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
