goodnight i made you a song goodbye
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
smell my finger.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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