we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
