I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
