Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
