if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Randomize
