lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
