you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
