Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
