I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Randomize
