God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
