You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize
