all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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