How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
