What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
A+ Viking dick
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Randomize
