Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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