It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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