we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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