I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Randomize
