Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
