If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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