dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize
