You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
You smell like a Billy Joel song
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Randomize
