Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize