If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Randomize