Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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