and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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