Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I'm both gender and math confused
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
