32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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