Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize